Social media and my anxiety

I am soon to be a PR professional and I really want to work with promotion on social and traditional media.

However, my concern is not over more traditional means.

I have been throughly addicted to Instagram.

I use Facebook to check in for a few minutes and answer to people on Messeger but Instagram is truly my weakness. I love the idea of having an image gallery and the possibility of posting videos without having to edit over on instastories. I love the idea of being able to share my daily life and my routine with a twist of humor to my friends.

But it saddens me.

I cannot lie that sometimes social media gets me feeling a little blue. People assume that ‘we millenials’ get sad over not having a certain number of views or likes and that’s why social media is bad for our mental health. It’s so much more than that.

Sharing your routine can be something good for you but it can be also seen as something bad for others. Competition and feeling of missing out is a natural human feeling and I am not ashamed of feeling it occasionally. And I don’t know but maybe someone also feels that way with my posts. I am all about spreading happiness and laugher, I would hate for someone to compare themselves with my life and feel bad. It’s a harmful cycle.

I can tell you in first hand that even if I posted every minute of my day you wouldn’t know what I am going through. I can be genuinly happy at that point as you saw on the instastory or going for a good cry in front of the mirror right after. Because like everyone, I feel like shit sometimes.

I left YouTube partially because of the underwhelming numbers I was getting but Instagram just saddens me.

YouTube is an amazing platform of creators and I wanted to be one so bad…I didn’t even realise that I was still one no matter what. I got too involved in the community and decided to create videos. These would take hours between filming and editing and the outcome would always come to be negative or neutral.

Most videos that I post now are for my own enjoyment. As if they are a lookbook. I realised that I didn’t need to continue with the videos if they didn’t make me happy.

I switched to writing and this blog. I am much happier now as I can ramble without editing and feel free in some other way that video doesn’t provide me. If I ever feel blue or like I need to talk, writing has always been my way out. I am very happy to have a platform that allows me to do that, even if in the public eye. I always think that my stories and thoughts may help someone even if for entertainment purposes.

I guess what I am saying is that I shall continue to write because that’s what makes me happy but I am confused about other platforms such as Instagram. Why would you continue with something that makes you unhappy?

Only if you don’t have a choice…and I do.

How does social media make you feel? Are there more positives to it than negatives to you? Do you have any advice for me?

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